Okay, okay, I admit it: These fly-by postings have to stop.  It's not that I'm too lazy to drop in, it's that I feel weird coming in every day and saying pretty much the same thing.  Ya know?  Unfortunately, not much has changed since the last time I was here, but I figured I'd better come in and say so, so that anyone who might be reading this will know that I haven't packed up the ol' fat suit and moved out.

It's been really difficult for me to get physically motivated. I'm doing pretty good in the food-changes department (I've had a few slips, but surprisingly, they haven't been major falls; I guess my brain must be starting to get the message that it's okay to crave - and enjoy - fruits and raw veggies, and that it's okay to have a bit of a treat every now and again  ), but the exercise department... Well, let's just say that needs some serious improvement...

I don't understand why it's so difficult.  I mean, I want to peel off the layers - every time I've gotten rid of a bunch, I get all excited and happy, and I feel like all is finally well in my world - but for some reason, I just can't seem to get moving like I need to.  I wish I knew what that was about... 

I guess maybe that's part of the reason why I haven't been here, lately; I think I'm embarrassed to come here, to tell you the truth. I haven't accomplished anything, and I guess I figure that the only time to be here is when there's progress.  Also, I've really been struggling with my hubby, who keeps buying me junk food - in spite of the fact that I've made it clear several times that I have to stay away from it.

He doesn't do this to be mean - he loves me, and all he's ever wanted is for me to be happy.  I sometimes think that on a subconscious level, maybe he's just scared that if I peel off all the layers, other men will start to notice me. I mean, if he really wanted me to be happy - which I would be if I was peeling off these awful layers - wouldn't it make more sense that he wouldn't buy me the foods I shouldn't be eating, knowing as he does that my willpower hasn't reached that point where I can look at that stuff and not want it?

Last night, we had pizza for supper.  The plan we went with includes six cans of pop, so hubby got three of his favorite pop, and three of my favorite pop.   Now, I should have spoken up and told him to get five of his favorite and just the one kind for me; that would have been the wise choice for me to make.  But, I didn't do that.  I don't know why.

Here's my advice to all the support people out there:

1.  If you really, truly support your loved one in this, don't bring them stuff they aren't strong enough, yet, to resist.

2.  On treat nights, talk to your loved one about making a fair compromise. Remind them that you want to be supportive to their efforts, and work out a deal you both feel is fair.

3.  No matter how rough things might get for your loved one, don't bring them food you know they shouldn't be eating! Using food to self-medicate only serves to push your loved one off the wagon - and they might not be able to get back on it again.  So, when your loved one is feeling emotional, give them a hug, tell them you love them, remind them how far they've already come in their efforts, and let them know that you're there for them.  In other words, BE THEIR SUPPORT.

Okay, well, I've babbled on long enough, I think.  I'm sick with a cold, so eating isn't really what I want to do right now, but I should at least make the effort before I take a NeoCitran and crash for awhile...